Since I'm a girl,

I feel like I should be better at expressing my feelings than I am. I find myself saying, "You know?" a lot. Which is find when I'm talking to my sister who can basically finish my sentences, but when you're trying to get to know someone you can't really leave off half your thought because you just don't know how to express yourself.

I just have no idea what I am feeling. I can finally sympathize with men who honestly just don't want to talk about their feelings. Like, what are feelings? What am I even looking for in someone? What do I even like and dislike?

I also find myself doing all the things I think are so stupid when other people do them. Like, why does this make me so angry? It doesn't even matter! If some other girl was mad about this I'd call her crazy.

My friend Jordan used to always tell me I was the craziest girl he'd ever met, but I always considered myself very level headed. 

So I'm like contradicting the things I've taken the lost pride in in the past. Part of me knows that it would be much easier to just quit now and not have to worry about this stupid relationship drama crap garbage, but then I might I remember how stupid I've been in past for the same reasons.

So I am, once again, asking myself: "Is this one gonna be different?" And I'm stupid enough to believe it might be.